Forgetting all I'm lacking , Completely incomplete
It is Monday again. I am at a shipper that I go to almost every Monday. I would guess 95 out of a 100. I deadhead, drive with an empty trailer (no weight) from Sunrise, FL the 70 miles to Clewiston, FL to pick up granulated sugar. They keep a supply of our empty trailers on hand, but it seems that Mondays, as early as I arrive, my load is to be a live load.
That's fine. I know the system here and all 7 doors, I know the trick, the swing, the angle. I can usually drop it in 1 or at the most 2 attempts.
However, I was watching a driver struggle with almost every aspect. His driving, opening and closing the doors, sliding the tandems. This took me back to my days as a trainer when in my Tough Love style of teaching I would insist the students go figure it out. My own trainer had a similar method. At least I show my students once first, lol.
The driver for another company also known as a Training Company like Stevens, and his struggles, his facial expressions and jerky, eager to please movements just reached down into me and has me thinking deeply.
I have known all my life that my Passion is to teach. Many opportunities to teach in a variety of settings and number of students have been afforded to me. Not really intersted in going to college to become a teacher. maybe when I had a young family at home, I would have liked the M-F, 7am-3pm lifestyle. Now, I like the flexibility and the adventure of not quite knowing where I will end up or begin.
Sunday was spent getting to know a new friend better. It was during that initial one-on-one getting to know you visit that we talk about our life so far, and our wishes, hopes, and dreams for our future. We share many similar beliefs, history, interests, hobbies, expressions and he is also a teacher. As time is going on these last few months, I am not as suprised as I might once have been.
So, today, early in a New Year, early in a work week, I am inspired to dream a little bigger than usual. To realize that I am not tossed aside on the trash heap of Life, and to think again, with new perceptions where am I going to let my Passion take me? Where can I direct my life? And letting it go, trusting into God's plans.
What can I change in me to make a positive Course shift?
The other driver? Figured the skills out, on his own. Surely he is going down the same highways that I will be taking and inside the cab of his truck he is feeling a little more confidence. A little more healthy pride in a job well-done. A little less questioning of "OMG are you CRAZY to want to be a truck driver?!"
And that Knowing makes me smile. For I have been there, the student. And I have been the instructor. Realizing I will get many more opportunities in this Life to do both. This pleases me, inside in my Dreaming Place.
With Joy,
Jan M. Olsen
~~J~
this song has always stirred the tenderness of my heart. It acts as an Adolph's tenderizer or mallet. Where it talks about "falling even more in love with you?"
I often substitute my own name in the blank
,,, letting go off all I've ever held onto,,, falling in love with me... I know if you are reading this, then you are someone I trust to "get this" concept and that you see with me the small, baby step victories in my personal walk with, Jan the woman.
And I imagine you smile and celebrate WITH ME.
Desperate for changing
Starving for truth
I'm closer to where I started
Chasing after you
I'm falling even more in love with you
Letting go of all I've held onto
I'm standing here until you make me move
I'm hanging by a moment here with you
Forgetting all I'm lacking
Completely incomplete
I'll take your invitation
You take all of me now...
I'm falling even more in love with you
Letting go of all I've held onto
I'm standing here until you make me move
I'm hanging by a moment here with you
I'm living for the only thing I know
I'm running and not quite sure where to go
And I don't know what I'm diving into
Just hanging by a moment here with you
There's nothing else to lose
There's nothing else to find
There's nothing in the world
That can change my mind
There is nothing else
There is nothing else
There is nothing else
Desperate for changing
Starving for truth
I'm closer to where I started
Chasing after you....
I'm falling even more in love with you
Letting go of all I've held onto
I'm standing here until you make me move
I'm hanging by a moment here with you
I'm living for the only thing I know
I'm running and not quite sure where to go
And I don't know what I'm diving into
Just hanging by a moment here with you
Just hanging by a moment (here with you)
Hanging by a moment (here with you)
Hanging by a moment here with you
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